"i remain in darkness"
first american edition, 1999.
ernaux hauntingly reveals the strength in witnessing what one cannot intervene in. “i remain in darkness” serves as a profound exploration of the ever-changing dynamic between mother and daughter, chronicling the gradual decline of her mother due to alzheimer's disease. the book covers three years, from the onset of her mother’s illness and her time living with ernaux, to her loss of understanding, leading to a final move into a nursing home where she would live out her days. the new york times book review notes, "as revealed by ernaux, the details of a loved one's deterioration have such emblematic force and terror that the particular becomes universal."
while her mother was in the hospital, ernaux began drafting a story about her mother’s life as a young, independent woman, in stark contrast to her later life in care. this initial draft was torn up in the immediate aftermath of her death and later rewritten as “a woman’s story.” the diaries ernaux kept during her mother’s illness remained unused as source material. ernaux explained, “i had committed to paper her last months and days, including the day preceding her death, without realizing it. this disregard for consequences—which may characterize all forms of writing, it certainly applies to mine—was horrifying. In a strange way, the diary of those hospital visits was leading me to my mother's death.” these journals contradicted the character ernaux had crafted in “a woman’s story,” and it was this coherence she imposed on her mother’s life that she chose to disrupt by publishing the pages in their original form. the title comes from her mother’s last written words: “i remain in darkness.”
new york: seven stories press. isbn: 1583220143. 8.5x6”. 94 pages. hardcover. bound in cloth-covered boards. book condition: slightest bumping to spine. fine. jacket condition: unclipped($18.95). fine. Item #417
Price: $175.00
